NEW JERSEY: SNOOKI'S got a sweet tooth! The "Jersey Shore" star was recently spotted in the Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory, groping every Oompa Loompa she could get her itty-bitty mitts on! "They're my people!" she squealed, "We're the same size and color!" According to sources, the pint-sized guidette was lifting her shirt, when she fell ass-backwards into a river of chocolate which led to a massive chocolate recall! A spokesman for the Wonka Factory held a press conference, explaining, "Snooki contaminated countless millions of chocolate bars with her Human Papilloma Virus!" Uh-oh, Fans! Don't be surprised if your next candy bar gives you a lip sore!
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